My Millenium Girl

I have walked to the far flung areas. I have met people from many different cultures, living styles and treasured a lifetime of memories with me. Every time I  sit to pen down my journey, I remember the travelogues, novels, articles where women and sex are spilled everywhere and I have never even made friend with person of opposite sex during all these times until this day when I talked to her. She is miraculous like my thoughts, like the waves of an ocean, like the soothing cold wind during the dusk. She sometimes appear like a mirage to me. She was always there; sometimes sitting in front of me, sometimes talking to me, chattering, making classes lively. This time, when I am writing, I question myself, I doubt myself, my feelings for her and I do wonder if my purpose after taking so much pains  to be here ends with her.

Yes, It was this beautiful afternoon  when the sky turned black and grey and the cold winds blew; I was relieved  of all the hot and humid weather when the soft droplets of drizzle fell on my hand outside my classroom windows; I was savoring each seconds of that time with joy when someone whispered to me from the back," So, you love rains?" I turned my head to see her. Her eyes sparkled when she spoke, her lips turned into a huge curve of beautiful smiles and the dark dotted freckle in her upper lips made her look like a Madonna of romance. I answered in a very low voice," Yes, I do."

"Master ji, you are too shy". She began to talk playfully.( Everyone in my circle called me Master ji.)

" No. My lady, You have not seen me speak yet."

" O'O, My lady..! When did I become your lady?" She was full of smiles. The conversation started and neither of us knew when to  end it. She loved rains, long long bike rides and adventures. She was living every second of her moments with grace, beauty and acceptance.

I once asked, " Should I write an article on you?"

 "What kind of article?"

"Well, your are liberal, open and people try to take advantage of you.They talk behind your back...." 

She interrupted in before I  could complete my sentence, " Wait, Wait, I know you write well. You are independent to write anything you want. But regarding what you have just said I really do not give a damn."

Yes, She is my millennium girl. She dares to live by her choices. She dreams, she does and she believes at what she does. I have never before met such a girl whose locus of control is so internal. She walks in the herd of wild boys and yet take the control of the reins. She smiles like a princess and orders like mistress. I  am telling you one more time, she is a phoenix who is re-borne everyday in her smiles, bathed in her happiness, soaked in her dreams and as beautiful as a dream. 

As she moves away from me to her destination, I miss her presence.

A normal boy's diary...

The winter has arrived folks..!! the night has suddenly become cold and windy. I walk out of my chair towards the balcony. As the cold air hits me, I come out to my senses. The basketball courts and the play ground that used to be crowded has no one tonight. I light the cigratte. The curls of white smoke coming out of my mouth goes up and vanishes in the darkness. The memories come alive out of it.

She was always there. A girl twice my size with the same height as mine, she has a fair complexion; a typical Indian look. For the first time, she came to speak to me with a huge smile on her face, I was dumbfounded. I was not prepared for such warm response. She was like some character out of movies who could easily mingle with anyone she wished to. The new work groups and the new faces kept appearing and one day some guys came and stole her public presence to their private ecstasy. Some of those who used to walk with her and couldn't get a space for themselves amongst her  new close-knit circle would often call her a slut. Ah..! what a beautiful way of defining oneself. When a person starts defining another person, s/he actually defines himself/herself.

I still didn't bothered about her. One day the supervisor gave us group work and she became a part of it. She came to discuss the matters while I was probing her. Why is the  plain, open, liberal girl like her called 'slut' by everyone? whomsoever I met would talk about her. What attracted so much frustration and negative criticisms against her? Oh yes, the size of her breasts were always brought into attention by anyone at anytime without it's having any relation with the topic or the circumstances.For the first time, I found her beautiful with her improperly threaded eyebrows, the brown eyes that became smaller and smaller as she spoke with me. I liked her.

Well, When I say 'I like her'. It does not mean 'I love her'. love is a very independent phenomenon. It is not the choice, it is the destiny when two independent people meet together. This meeting should be able to establish a strong foundation of mutual understanding, care and unconditional giving without expecting anything in return.  

As I sat down with my laptop in my apartment, I had nothing in my mind other than one desire to complete the given task. How on earth was I supposed to know that a few hours of chat would change the pattern of  spending my time? As I started to talk with her on Facebook , we inquired as much as we could about each other that the national spying agencies would appear dismal in front of the information we extracted out of each other. She was irresistible. She went offline to go to sleep while I remained fathomless throughout              the night.

She was beautiful with her imperfections. We began to share casual gestures at times, spoke openly. She was not the one to wait for anything. She was too quick at establishing relations and moving out of it.  My eyes followed each steps she took in the floor we worked; I kept searching for ways when I could see her without her knowing it. I became a lost soul. confused soul. Not a week had passed and there were rumors she is having an affair again. Those boys attached with the fresh rumors claim to have loved the way 'she was whoring around' with them. I was thunderstruck by their opinions.  Was it happening because she was letting it happen ? I wonder why did she find it cool to hang out with guys who never spoke good of her.

Every ordinary guys like me would have a similar story to share.Even these small things create a great despair among poor souls. The grief brought by these small incidents shape and mold a person's perception that emerges out of incapability to be with the girl and the next time he sees that girl again he might also say ,'She is a slut' but I cannot call her so as I value each individuals' choice and decisions. My thoughts swing like the pendulum of a clock between illusion and reality. Somewhere deep inside, I want my mind to believe that she will take her time and one day she will be mine...!!

The cold air hits me hard this time. I light the other cigratte. I am numb as I do not know where I stand. She keeps coming in my mind while the rest of the world goes to sleep. 

Discovering oneself..!!

 Its been months since I left home. It was a decree of my heart. It was a sort of a  self imprisonment of two years inside the four walls of a house, a few friends and a limited time for fresh air nearby Raaniban ( a forest name under Shivapuri National Park). The end week of July, my heart decided to roam freely, on my own. I wanted to be that same old guy who enjoyed every seconds of his life, who was carefree of the opinions of the world, who believed in oneself more than anything else, who believed in love and care for others and most important of all I was the one who was never exhausted of giving. At the time, I am typing these words, In this wonderland of India, I know that I am carving my own life. Before I realize anything, Its been months I have been here.

A rucksack, one sleeping bag, few clothes, few amounts of money, few phone numbers and a bus ticket; Was that enough for me to undertake this journey? No. More than anything else, I had faith in the journey I was making. The process of self discovery should start alone.

 The world has become too ambitious. People see competition everywhere and they keep pushing. But despite all the efforts and investment, how many people succeed? We all know the answer. Very few. What is the difference between those people who succeed and those who end up living in the miseries of their memories? May be the difference lies in the process of pushing oneself while exploring our potentials. The ones who have been successful always claimed to have listened to their hearts, to their hunches, to their innermost voice. Can we call this a process of self discovery?

I had everything there. My back was against my walls. I have the most loving and supportive parents, a brother who is always there behind me, friends I can count on. But the fire was missing.  The fiery me was long dead. The drive, the passion was no more. Once again, I needed to come out of my family cocoon. Before I knew which road lies ahead of me, I have already passed days, weeks and months here. The process of self discovery is a journey of belief.

I was leap frogging. I have started jumping. Its been months I have been walking  in the sweltering heat and the sudden downpours in the vast areas of Punjab. I have met families whom I can call my own, I have met new faces whom I can call my friends. I can get lost in a crowd without being noticed. I have to be  as humble as a hermit. I can at times make faces and  wink at the beautiful ladies who pass by without noticing me. I am living many facets of my life at the same time. I can grumble at no one, no one to complain with. I am learning to solve the problems at hand rather than waste my time. Yes, I have started jumping at feet lengths of self- love, self confidence, self discovery.

I do not know how long will I stay in India. My journey has just begun. There are vast areas of land to travel,  many mountains to trek, many people to meet. We all know future is uncertain. Living with joy among those uncertainties and making the most of my present is what shapes me. There is a long way to go....!!

The most beautiful creation

I have been thinking about the most beautiful creation on earth. I wanted to write something on the topic.The more I ponder over the subject, the more confusing it appears. I have read and heard at innumerable instances that ' People are the most beautiful creation of God'. I repeated this term again and again and yet I could not believe it. This does not mean people are not beautiful or my perception about people have become something else. My focus suddenly changed from people to God. This letter word "GOD", who created this term ?

I do not know if God exists but I believe in God as an unknown entity who is behind all the creations.Since nobody has been able to identify with the cause of creation of this magnificent earth, the universe ; I bestow this term 'God' to that unknown reason behind it.

I have never understood religion.Whenever someone says 'God', they immediately attach it to religion. Suddenly, this beautiful word 'God' used to appear gruesome, unstable.powerless, frightful to me. I once read a friend's status in facebook ,"God is the greatest lie to humanity". Is God a lie?

I can with my head held high, with my undaunting pride cry aloud to the world that "God" is the most beautiful creation on earth. No beings, no substance, no feeling appear as beautiful as "God".

Religion for me is an attempt of the humans with lust for power to rule.When the term God came into existence, stories were built upon it. These stories were different according to the people, the geography, their way of living and so on. So the shape,size, colour, nature and nurturing the beliefs on God became different. Therefore, people in different places had different Gods. I believe that those storytellers and their bastions suddenly found a reason to be superior than those who merely heard them with interest and reverence.So they divided these different Gods into religions. This division was not enough to rule. The caste and traditions came into existence to help them establish their norms. Every country's history therefore has 'priests' as the agent of power. It holds equally true at present time as well.

God is such an irresistible word. Every human is so accustomed to it. It has an aroma that suddenly brings peace of mind, stirs ones thought patterns, instills hope in the hopeless; courage to the fearful and has at many instances discouraged much evil on earth.

Detach "God" from religion and all the walls between people will fall down. The mankind will come into unison. The world will become free of almost all the evils caused by religion in the name of God.

"God" is above all the most beautiful creation. 

मेरो देश खोज्दै

सडकहरू सुन-सान छन । सुर्यदेवलाई धन्यबाद् दिन्छु । मेरा कानहरू बिहान-बेलुकी सडक, पत्रिका, टि.भी, रेडियोमा गुन्जिने आवाजहरूले कसो बहिरा भएनन् ।  सबै जातले आफ्नो आफ्नो राज्य माग्दै गर्दा म यो चर्को घाममा मेरो देश खोज्दै छू ।

मेरो देश जहाँ म ब्राह्मनको छोरो, छिमेकी राईनी आमैलाई ठुली आमै भनेर पुकार्थें । पल्लो कोठामा जाडको घ्याम्पो हुन्थ्यो र वल्लो कोठामा मलाइ दुध चिउरा दिन्थिन । उनी परलोक गएको ८-१० बर्ष भो, उनसंगै मेरो देश'नी कता गयो कता !    मेरो देशमा कहाँ लेक मा कुनै एउटा मान्छे मर्दा, बेसिमा हाम्रा बौ-बाजे गनगन् गर्थे । मानो- पाथी थियो, K.G  भन्ने थाहा थिएन  । झुपडी थिए, पक्का घर मुस्किलले भेटिन्थ्यो । गरीब थिए तर पेट भोको कसैको थिएन । ठुला- ठुला परिवार हुन्थे, सानो परिवार सुखी परिवार भन्ने थिएन । पाउरोटी सुनेका थियौं, खान हुन्न भन्थे । मकैको रोटी या कोदाको ढीडो जिब्रो फट्काइ-फट्काइ खान्थ्यौं । बा'ले शहर घुमाउन ल्याउदा झिलिमिली थियो, रमाइलो थियो । शहर सफा  थियो । बागमती नी नुहाउन लगे; हाम्रो गाऊँको खोलो जस्तै सफा थियो ।

हा ! मेरो देश, कठै ! मेरो देश । गर्छु भन्नेले नी' गरि खान पाउने भएनन् । हरेक दिन बन्द छ, चर्का नाराहरू छन् । गर्मीले पोल्न थालेपछी म एउटा रुखको छहारिमा बस्न खोज्छु । एउटा पागल छेउमै बसेर फत्फताउदै थियो । मलाइ देखेपछी उ झन् झन् चर्को स्वोरले कराउन थाल्यो । अरु दुई चार रमितेहरू कुरा सुन्न थपिए ।

"मेरो राज्य ६०१ दलालहरूले बेच्दै छन् । तीनलाई तैं चोरहरूले देश् बेच्न पठाएको हो । त्यहाँ नाइके जति सब ब्राह्मन जातको छ बुझिस । " म स्तब्ध भएँ । कोइराला, भट्टराई, दाहाल, पौडेल, वली, नेपाल जस्ता केहीले ब्राह्मनको परिभासा फेरिदिएछन । ब्राह्मन कुनै जात होईन । ब्राह्मन सत्य हो, ब्राह्मन भक्तिमा लिप्त हुनुको अवस्था हो । ब्राह्मन ज्ञान हो, तत्वबोध हो ।   जो ब्राह्मन हो, उसका लागि जिब, निर्जिब सब समान हो । मैले भनेको छु, म ब्राह्मनको छोरो हो, स्वयम् ब्राह्मन होईन । 

"  सुक्रे पनि त यही रहेछ ।"   त्यहि हुलबाट परिचित अनुहारहरू देखा पर्छन । चिनेकाहरूले सुक्रे भनेर बोलाउछन । सुक्रात पनि बहुलाहा जस्ता थिए रे, म नी त्यस्तै छु रे ! म रातो पिरो हुन्छु । मनमनै डर लागेर आउछ । कतै देश खोज्नु पागलपन त होईन ? मलाइ अब यिनले थाहा पाए भने के  भन्लान् ?  

   साना- साना भुराहरूलाई बाबु- राजा भन्छन्, आइस्यो र गैस्यो भन्न सिकाउछन यो सहरमा । हाम्रा गाऊमा बेलुका आगनको डीलबाट " ए राडी- मुर्दारहो तिमीहरूलाई घिच्न पर्दैन ? छिट्टो मर त" भनेर खाना खान बोलाउछन अधिकान्स आमाहरू । तर शहरका बाबु- राजाहरूमा न बा- आमा प्रति, न समाज प्रति न देश प्रति कुनै लगाव छ । हाम्रा गाऊका राडी- मुर्दार धेरै जिम्मेवार र परिपक्व छन् । ती पनि म जस्तै "एकादेस"को मेरो देश खोज्दै होलान् । के म लगायत ती सबै पागल होलान् त ?

मेरो देश नेताहरूको जातिय राजनितीको हतीयार बन्दै छ । म कोँगो, रुवान्डाको जातिय द्वन्दका दर्दनिय कथाहरू सम्झन थाल्छु । म भाव सुन्य हुन्छु ।

  "ओइ सुक्रे भाई कता हिंडेको । अनी कतै नहेरी हिंडेको छौ त ?" लामा दाइको पसल अगाडी आइपुगेछु । डल्ले- डल्ले यी दाई, तमाङ लामा हुन् । यो सहरमा पढ्न बसेदेखी साँझपख गफ गर्दै चुरोट खाने गर्छौ हामी । अरु पनि बन्दले गर्दा त्यहि आएका रहेछन् । चुरोटको धुवा संगै जीवनका सूख- दु:ख देखि बाटोमा हिड्ने तरुनीलाई संगै बसेर जिस्काउदै धेरै बर्षका साँझहरू यहाँ बितेको छ ।  

 "त्यो संबिधान सभा भवनमा गएर बम पद्काइदिउ न ।" छेउमै उभिएका फर्निचर पसलका मधेसी दाईले कुरो अगाडी बढाए । त्यहाँ नी' मेरो देश खोज्दै रहेछन् सबै ।

" त्यसो गर्नु हुन्न । त्यति राम्रो भवन छ । नेपालमा फेरि त्यस्तो भवन बनाउने कोहि राम्रो मान्छे जन्मेला जस्तो छैन । तीनलाई देश निकाला गर्नु पर्छ ।" अर्का लोकसेवामा खर्दारको जाँच दिएर बसेका मास्टर साप बोले ।

"हाम्रो सुक्रे भाईको केही भन्नु छ की ?" त्यसै घरका घरबेटी दाईले सोधे ।

"मेरो देशको साशनको बागडोर  जनताको हाथमा हुनुपर्छ दाइ । दुई चारवटा पार्टीको काने-खुसिको भरमा राज्य चलिरह्यो भने यो भन्दा धेरै दुखदायी दिनहरू आउनेछन ।" म यति भन्दै चुप रहिरहे । सबै स्तबध भए । मौन स्विक्रिती जनाए । शायद म जस्तै यी पनि आफ्नो देश खोज्दै छन् ।  

              

       

Most Unwanted People

I do not like politics. Being a citizen of a country where politicking is an essential component for people from all walks of life; every circumstances encourages a person here to hate politics, to believe that it is a dirty game.Should I change my opinion? How would it look like if I try seeing it from a different perspective? I have been asking these questions for  few days.

The impingement of wrong political values in every spheres of Nepalese society have set forth wrong notion against politics among a  mass. We have been cheesed off by political diaspora of the country. The recent rise of bandhs( strike) and the voices coming from behind these suggest a political turmoil of a different nature. I have this inkling, if Nepal is going to be a sort of GUJARAT of India. I am getting negative vibes now.

"One of the poorest, land locked , capital locked countries of the world". To add further to the woes  of this description, a  threat of rise in the tribal/ethnic riots. 

I do not have a foggiest idea in my mind for any positive change. How do we get rid of this then? Well, let us all declare the 601 members of the constituent assembly as the " Most unwanted people of the country". 

What further can we do then? Well, get rid of everything that is hindering our progress. Throw away the government, end  the  bureaucracy and liberate the nation. By doing so, I am starting to believe that our nation will no more be landlocked or capital locked. We will not have to set targets to bring in a million tourists. We will not have to worry about poverty and unemployment.  

Nepal with an open border between India and China can clearly call an attention of the world. With a hassle free country to move about, a market that can cater to more than half of the population of the world; I wonder who would not want to invest here.

I often thought about the security of our nation. Well, with all the mighty powers settling in my land to cater to the largest market of the world. With millions of people moving in and out of my country; the presence of the international community would be too strong. I wonder, who would really dare to encroach our territory.  

We will not have state mechanism to meddle with people's affairs. No politicians to blame for the deficiencies of the market. Yes, there will be inefficiency. But we will have options to choose. Our choice; the choice of the market will correct them. Ah! what a beautiful and prosperous country Nepal would be. 

Did I say I do not like politics? Politics rule the roost of all the things we consume. But we do not need the huge number of dumb people that consume all the resources and energy . They are our biggest expenses.   Let  us  begin with the first step; declare the 601 as the " Most unwanted people " of our nation.

Death of a street boy

He is dead

and now he lay at rest

there upon that little bed of dirts

his solemn stillness, the calm face looked as though to smile

Because for him,

to live was no great.

He is gone for a sleep so deep

into that slumber so beautiful

with no trace of pains, din and bustle to bear

so majestic a sleep can be

no superiors might have ever slept

the cold stiff body,calm expressionless face

seemed to tell me

He always dreamt of beautiful deaths.

So fresh a creature he looks

as he used to be when he trotted around

among the heap of dirts beside my house

embedded with elations when he found tin cans and metals

that day he would laugh gaily

to all those who looked with such coldness as he is today.

As the dusk prepares to welcome the night

Many street pupil begin to come

the bodies in rags cried a lot

There among the crowd were also the gentlemen

Drivers stopped by, people dismounted from their cars to take a look

But then someone said

"Ah! what a beautiful sleep

no God might have ever slept".

उध्रिएका सपना

उध्रिएका सपना
   सिलाउने के ले हो
गैसकेको  बैंस
   फर्काउने कस्ले हो ।।

दौतरि त पाखा लागे
   भेट्ने  कसलाई हो
ब्यथाहरू गाठो परे
   सुनाउने कसलाई हो ।।

गीतहरू लेखेको
   गुन-गुनाउने कस्ले हो
मदिराको प्याला
  साथ् दिने कस्ले हो ।।

शुभ बोल बोल

बिहान सवेरै यसो हाथ-खुट्टा तन्काउन रानिबनतिर हिड्दै थिएं । टहलिंदा टहलींदै घाम निधारसम्म आइपुगेछ । घर तीर लम्किए । घर आइपुग्दा आमा कौसीबाट कराउंदै हुनु हुन्थ्यो । गेट छेउमै उभिएको बिजुलीको खा'मोमा बसेर काग कराइ रहेको थियो । " हा ! हा ! शुभ बोल बोल ", आमा कराउंदै कागलाई धपाउने कोशिश् गर्दै हुनु हुन्थ्यो ।  काग एकोहोरो चर्को चर्को सँग कराउंदै थियो ।

मेरो ध्यान कागतिर गएन । सृस्‍टिले उसमा दिएको गुण अनुरुप उ चलिरहेको थियो, त्यसमा के दोस कागको ? हाम्रो धार्मिक संस्कारनै केलाउने हो भने पनि, काग यमको सन्देस बाहकको भूमिका अटुट रुपमा निभाउदै छ । जब काग दिनभर घर नछोडी कराएको केही दिनमा मेरि हजुरआमा बित्नुभो' मलाइ कागले बहन गरिरहेको एउटा जिम्मेवारी प्रति ईस्र्या लाग्यो । 

 तर मान्छे !...मान्छेले  मेरो ध्यान  तानिरह्यो । एक अर्कालाई मार्ने मान्छे, काट्ने मान्छे, एउटा  मान्छेको सबैभन्दा डरलाग्दो दुश्मन अर्को मान्छे । जहाँ जान्छु, जो सँग बोल्छु; अर्को मान्छेको कुरा काट्नमा ब्यस्त छ मान्छे, अर्को ब्यक्तिलाई खसाल्नमा ब्यस्त छ अधिकांस मान्छेको सोंच ।  मैले सोंचे," शुभ बोल बोल " त मान्छेलाई सबैभन्दा पहिले भन्नु जरुरी रहेछ । मैले त सुरु पनि गरिसकें । म काहीँ जाँदा,कसैसँग बोल्दा पहिले आफ्नो लागि अनी आफूसँग वार्तालापमा सहभागी हुनेहरुका लागी  म त भनि हाल्छु " शुभ बोल बोल" । 

सबैको सोँच शुभ रहोस, सबका वाणी शुभ रहुन । धन्य काग...!!!              

    

नारी दिवस अनि मेरो आफ्नै गन्थनहरू ..

अन्तरास्ट्रिय नारी दिवस । हिजै बेलुका देखि लेख्छु भन्दा भन्दै आज बेलुका भयो । के लेखुँ ,मनभरी कुराहरु छन् । दुई दिन देखि आफ्नै अन्तर-कुन्तरमा बहस चलेको चल्यै छ ।  अधिराज्यका पढे-लेखेका महिलाहरू, स्वभिमानी महिलाहरू, श्रीमानका पद र पैसाको तुजुक देखाउन पाएका महिलाहरू, श्रीमान र परिवारलाई पालिरहेका महिलाहरू, सुकिला- मुकिला देखिने महिलाहरू अनि मिठा- मिठाइ लाग्ने नारी दिवसमा घुलेका महिला सशक्तिकरनका अवाजहरु , समानताका अवाजहरू, अवसर र चुनौतिका लागि  गुन्जिरहेका अवाजहरू ।

तर कति बुलन्द छन् त यी अवाजहरू ? के यी अवाजहरू अस्ति भर्खरै 'बोक्सि'को आरोपमा आफ्नै गोठछेउ निर्घात कुटाइ खाइ, जलाएर मारिएकी महिलाको गाऊँमा पुग्छन् । पुग्दैन भने अझै जोडले कराउनु पर्‍यो, त्यसो गर्न सकिदैंन भने बन्द गरिद्नु यी अवाजहरू ।  मेरि अस्ति भर्खरै ९४ बर्षको उमेरमा बित्नु भएकी हजुराआमाले सुन्नुभएको भए सबैलाई यही भन्ने थिईन । कर्म गरेपछी नतिजा आउदैन भने त्यस्ता कर्म गर्नेलाई झटारो हान्थिन मेरि मामाघरे हजुरआमा । 

 नारी अदित्तिए प्रेम, धैर्य र प्रकृतिको स्वरूप हुन । यो कुरा पुस्तौँदेखी हाम्रा शास्त्रमा लेखिएर आएको छ । मैले पनि स्कुल पढ्दा घोकेको दुई लाइन  याद् आयो :   " यत्र नारी यस्तु पुज्यन्ते:  

                                                                          रमन्ते तत्र देवता "।

जहाँ नारीको पूजा हुन्छ, त्यहा देवता पनि रमाउछन ।   मन्दिरै मन्दिरको शहर भएको हाम्रो देशमा, श्रद्धालुहरूको ओइरो लाग्ने हाम्रो देशमा, देवता रमाएका छन् की छैनन् ? म नित्से होईन तर मेरो यो प्रश्न हरेक जिम्मेवर नागरिक माथी तेर्सौउदै छु ।  जुन देशमा "छाउपेडी"मा एउटा महिलाको रजस्वलाको समयमा मृत्‍यु हुन्छ, जहाँ जिम्मेवार पदमा आसिन पतीबाट निहत्था श्रीमती मरिन्छिन, दाइजोका नाममा अझै शोषन हुन्छ,बोक्सी बनाई बनाइ मार्छन, अर्धाङी भनि भनि बैबाहिक हिन्सा, अत्याचार,मानसिक प्रताडना दिन्छन्, के त्यहा तिम्रा देवता खुशी होलान् ? जुन मन्दिरहरूमा देवता खुशी छैनन्, बन्द गर जान ती  मन्दिर?   

  मैले मन्दिरको मर्म बुझेको छैन । नेपाल र भारतका प्राय मन्दिर घुमे तर मैले मेरो देवता भेटिन । साधुहरूसँग बसें, सन्तहरूसँग हिंडे, गँगोत्रीमा घन्टौसम्म कुर्दा पनि मैले जवाफ नपाएपछी रिसले चुर भएर हींडेथे । घर आइपुग्दा प्रेमले मुसार्दै मेरो छोरो कहाँ पुगेर आयौ भन्दै निक्लेकी मेरि "आमा" मा मेरो देवता पाएँ । म नास्तिक होईन किनकी अस्ति भर्खर बितेकी मेरि हजुरआमा जै'ले बिदा हुने बेला आँगनमा मलाई म्वाइ खाँदै खुसुक्क मेरो गोजीमा पैसा हालिदिन्थिन अनि उनको जोडी आँखाबाट थोपा थोपा आसुँ पालै पिलो चाउरी परेका गाला हुँदै कलेटी परेर सुकेका ओठसम्म आइपुग्थे । मेरो देवता त्यतिखेर भेटें  ।

  ' नारी दिवस कसका लागि मनाउछौ ? अवाज भएका महिलाहरू जस सँग स्वर छैन तीनको स्वोर बन अनि जोड जोडले चिच्याउ ताकि पहराहरू पछाडि लुकेका झुपडीहरूमा सुर्यदय भन्दा पहिले तिम्रा अवाजहरू गुन्जिउन ! सक्दैनौ भने बन्द गर अवाजहरू........!!! ',    हा ! आज क्रान्ति ओकल्दै छ मेरो कलमले पनि ! 

   तर साँचै नै परिवर्तन् देख्नु छ भने हरेक अवसर पाइरहेका महिलाहरूले आँफै बाट सुरु गर्नु पर्दछ । तब मात्र परिवर्तनको सन्देसका सम्बाहक बन्न सक्दछन् । नेपालि चेलीहरू पुरुष जस्तै साउदीमा छन्, लिब्यामा छन्, अमेरिका अनि यूरोपमा छन् । फेसबूकमा एउटा फोटोमा 'बिकिनी'मा देखिएकी मेरि केटी साथि अर्को फोटोमा त्यतिक्कै सुन्दर 'सारीमा' सजिएर फोटो हाल्छे अनि म दंग पर्छु ! नेपालमा परिवर्तन र अधुनिकिकरन त आएको छ तर केही न्युन प्रतिसतमा सिमित छ । मेरा अघिल्ला कुराहरुमा बिरोध प्रकट पक्कै गरेको होईन । म चाहन्छु नारी दिवस साँचै देशका हरेक नारीहरूको पर्व बनोस् जहाँ हरेक नारी समान रूपले सीक्षीत र आफ्नो जीवनको निर्णय स्वयमले गर्ने सक्ने अधिकार र स्वतन्त्रताले ले सम्पन्न होउन् !   

        

            

रटान लगाउने सुगाहरू..!

"ए दाई ! कोपी कृष्ण काउ  , कोपी कृष्ण काउ  !"

 छिमेकी अंकलको घरमा छिर्न नपाउँदै पट्टु कराउन थाल्यो । सधैं यसरी नै कराउंथ्यो । त्यो कुरा राम्ररी बोल्न सकोस भनेर बेला बेलामा रातो खुर्सानी ख्वाउने गरेको मैले पनि देखेको छु । तर आज खस खस लागिरह्यो । कता कता मन बिझाइरह्यो  । 

हा ! हा ! क्या दशा यो ! म देशैभरी सुगाहरू देख्न थाल्छु । यी थरी थरिका सुगाहरू, रङी- चंगी सुगाहरू, ज्ञानले बलेका जस्ता सुगाहरू, पैसाले पुरिएका जस्ता सुगाहरू ;   राष्ट्रिय राजनितीमा हैकम जमाइरहेका , शिक्षामा , स्वास्थ्यमा, सुरक्षामा । कहाँ छैनन् यी सुगाहरू ?   सुगाहरू मेरो राष्ट्रको  नशा-नशामा, गरा-गरामा बसेका छन् । राष्ट्रिय मकैबारी भुसुक्कै पार्दै छन् ।

 हेर्दा हामि जस्तै बोल्छन । हाम्रै बिच बस्छन । मौका पाउने बित्तिकै काधमै चद्छन् ।  यी कुनै दक्षिणतिर , कुनै उत्तर त कुनै सात समुन्द्र पारीबाट धेरै समयपछी आएका हून रे ! त्यतै यिनलाई खुर्सानी खुवाएर येस्ता भाषा बोल्न सिकाएका रे ! यी सुगाहरू कोहि पूँजीवाद , कोहि समाजवाद, कोहि माओबाद ,कोही खुल्ला अर्थतन्त्र लगयतका दुनियाँ मन्त्र उच्चारण गर्छन् । एउटै कुराको रटान लगाउछन् । 

  यी सुगाहरू आफ्नो समाजमा भन्दा धेरै खुर्सानी दिनेहरू तिरै धेरै बस्छन् । यिनको जीवन सैलि अधिकान्स तेस्तै छ ।  जब जब राष्ट्रमा बाली-नाली लगाउन थालिन्छ, तब तब यी सुगाहरू रटान लगाउछन् । यिनको 'कोपी कृष्ण कौ' ले हामी आजित भएका छौँ ! 

   राष्ट्र बिकासका नीम्ति हाम्रो आफ्नो समाजका इस्थापित आधारहरूलाई एउटै समानन्तर धागोमा उनेर लैजन सक्ने क्षमता चाहिन्छ । त्यो कुनै रटान, कुनै सिद्धान्तले जोत्दैमा , त्यस्ता मल हाल्दैमा बाली सप्रिदैन । हाम्रो इस्थानिय भु-बनोट , त्यस्को अनुसन्धान पर्याप्त मात्रामा हुन अझै सकेको छैन । गर्नेहरू थोरै छन् ? खुर्सानी खाएर ओकल्नेहरू धेरै छन् । 

   आज त्यसै त्यसै सुगा देखि घ्रिणा लागेर आयो । के कुरा गर्न आएको थिए भुसुक्कै बिर्सेछु !    

2012 लाई स्वागत गर्दै.... !

घर आउँदा बत्ति थिएन । राजधानीको बाटोभरी नयाँ बर्षको एउटा अलग्गै रौनक थियो, उत्साह थियो । साज-सज्जा गरेर घर बाहिर निक्लिएका जमातहरू प्रसस्तै थिए ;कोही साथीहरूसँग, कोहि आफन्तहरूसँग, कोहि परिवारसँग र त्यो हूलहरूको बिचमा म एक्लै रमाउदै ती सबैसँग रमाएको थिए । लेख्न मन त धेरै छ । बत्ति आउने बित्तिकै कम्प्युटर अगाडी बसेर टाईप गर्न थालेको छू ; मन भरी रहेका कुराहरु मन्थन गर्दै छू आएको बर्ष २०१२ लाई स्वागत गर्दै छू ।             

बितेको बर्ष तपाईंहरूको कस्तो रह्यो ? शायद सबैकालागि केही तितो, केही मिठो ; केही अलि धेरै लडे होलान्, पछारिए होलान तर उठ्नु ठुलो कुरा हो । उठेर नयाँ हौसलाका साथ डटेर, दत्तचित्त भएर, अझ मिहिनेत र लगनका साथ अगाडि बढ्ने अबसर लिएर तपाइहरुका लागि नयाँ बर्ष आएको छ । केही अली धेरै सफल भएका होलान्, २०११ भरी गम्कियेर, फुर्ती र उच्च मनोबल बोकेर हिंड्न पाएका होलान् । २०१२ नयाँ चुनौतीहरू, अझ अर्को बर्षको खुशीहरू,सफल्ताका गाथाहरूमा अर्को नयाँ सफल बर्ष जोड्ने मौका दिनलाई आएको छ ।               

जीबन त एबम् रितले अगाडि बढिरहन्छ । कसैले केही पाउछन, कसैले केही गुमाउछन । पाउनु र गुमाउनुको होडमा हामी कति रोयौँ होला, कति हास्यौँ होला । कति बिरक्तिएर जाडमै चुर्लुम्म डुब्यौँ होला, ब्यथाहरू चुरोटको धुवासंगै सल्काएर पियौँ होला । कैले सूख त कैले दु:खमा मौका खोजी खोजी जीवनलाई आफ्नै अनुकुल परिभासित गर्दै पियौँ । सन् २०१२ सबैका लागि जीवन पिउने अर्को बर्ष लिएर आएको छ ।  

  सन् २०११ मेरा लागि पनि मैले माथी भने जस्तै रह्यो । कैले मैले दुई पला जिए, कैले पलले मलाई पियो । अली अली खुशीहरू दियो, अली अली दु:ख पनि । मिसावट जीवनको सत्य हो जस्तो लाग्छ । साचैँ कसैको जीवन चोखो दु:ख , बिसुद्ध खुशी मात्र छैन । जीवन सबकालागि दुधमा पानी, खान-पानमा बिसादी जस्तै छ । मेरो लागि यस्तै याबत् अनुभुतीहरू दिएर २०११ले आँगन छाडेको छ । तर मिसावटको   प्रभाबलाई कम गर्ने उपाय मैले भट्टीमा सिकेर आएँ । व्हिस्कीमा पानी र कागती मिसाए  जस्तै आफ्नो जीवनमा हाँसो र उमंग मिसाउने प्रयास निरन्तर गर्नुपर्छ । एउटा द्रिढ विश्वाश र शान्त- शुशिल मन भए ,२०१२ पक्कै पनि धेरै खुशी , थोरै दु:ख होला ।  

  

आँखा गाढिएको छ, निद्राले गाँज्न थाल्यो । आजकै जस्तो माहौल बनिरहोस् । हरेक दिन बाटोभरी हाँसेका, खुले-खिलेका मुहारहरू देख्न पाऊँ । २०१२ लाई म पनि तपाईंहरू जस्तै स्वागत गर्दै छू ।