Sunday, March 16, 2014

LET IT GO

I had long, curly, shabby hair. I was a loner. I hardly talked to anybody. I sat alone in my desk and books from the Library were my friends. Can you believe it? A post graduate student with all these traits. But that changed when a classmate took faster strides along with me and invited to his room. A new digital music system with old songs and interesting things about his past over a cup of tea. It was one and a half years back and today I bade him the final Goodbye.

Goodbyes aren't easy. They have never been easy for me. A decade long life of school in a boarding house earned me life long friends and almost everyone were teary as we departed. I wonder, how did my parents cope with it? How do people fill that vacuum inside them? As years keep passing by, we become used to losing. May be deep inside our heart, we keep saying "LET IT GO".

At an early age, I stayed away from my parents. As time progressed, I learnt to enjoy the company of friends. Want to dress, eat, live the way I wanted could never come true. There were limitations, rules and regulations, the violation of which had severe consequences. During graduating years, I learnt to keep personal secrets from my parents. I bunked classes to a date which ended with bitter memories. My parents knew about it, but they also thought to, "Let it go". Life was teaching me lessons when another girl, I fell for, My MUSE suddenly said, she is getting engaged. It is as if loosing is what we are here for. The ultimate purpose of being borne as a living being. Every circumstances tells you to let go, keep quiet and silently face the music of life. Yes, I kept quiet. It is even more painful. It is suffocating, but I am living through it everyday. A long time ago, my younger brother used to put on a quote, " When the going gets tough, the tough get going". To precisely add to it, I lost my Grandfather.

I am not ruthless. I am not heartless but time has numbed me. May be my parents cry in their solitude. May be my gal also felt the pain but as a rational being, she found better options. Is that how Life should always be? Should we always be suppressed by failures over the nature of life?

Have I lost only? What about the gains, I have made in Life? Do they outweigh what I have lost in due course of time? Ah! there are so many questions, that cannot be answered. May be because, there are more questions that will pop up as we keep living. It's the fate of being a mortal being.

I therefore bade my friend, a simple goodbye, as we hugged each other tightly and I said to myself," LET IT GO". On this day of holi ( festival of colors), Life splashed another color in my Life.

1 comment:

  1. again beautifully written goodbye, I guess Kropakar is leaving. i wish all success and triumph for you both.

    ReplyDelete

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